Daily Archives: November 9, 2005

The Peril of the Pears and Other Cooking Disasters

We make our own baby food. Why buy it when I can blend it, right? So my hubby this evening blended a can of pears for me tonight. Not just a small can, but a giant costco can. There was just one tiny glitch in the execution. I was on the phone. That should really sum it up right there. Hubby with important question + Distracted wife = Pear disaster. He looked at me, I looked at him. He pointed to the pears and then to the sink. I thought, “ahh, he wants to know if he should blend them with the pear juice or with water.” I point to the Cuisenart. Therein lies the fatal mistake. He was not thinking what I was thinking (are they ever? 🙂 ) He was thinking, “should I pour out the juice or dump it all in?” Now those of you unfamiliar with Cuisenart anatomy, let me give a brief lesson. In the center of the Cuisenart bowl is one of those little plastic tubes sticking up that you set on top of the base and the plastic center of the base comes up through the hole and that is where you attach your blades etc. We were using just a metal chopping blade that sat in the bottom of the bowl. I had previously told Paul that when grinding the baby food that it would not leak. So in he dumps the pears, juice and all. Quite instantly the juice overflows the center part and there is pear juice quickly flooding onto the Cuisenart, counter, and floor (which I mopped yesterday). Paul looked at me and I started laughing, and looked changrinned. “You said it wouldn’t leak!” I laughed even harder, “I hadn’t meant if it was just water or juice.” I teased him some more and he gave me a bad time and cleaned up the mess. (I think I’ll still have to remop though.)

After, and during, the pear episode I was trying to make brownies. I got everything mixed and put in the oven. I forgot to set the timer (gee I wonder why?) and so Paul guessed at a time and set the timer. When it beeped I went to check on them an discovered that the oven hadn’t been turned on. They were partially cooked however because the oven was still hot from the stuffed peppers I had cooked for dinner. So I finished them up. About 5 minutes ago, a good hour after they were down, Paul called to me, “Aren’t you going to add the caramel stuff?” AAAGGGHHH!!! I was supposed to add it before the brownies were cooked, guess I’ll save it for the next batch. What a night!

There is also the time when I was baking cupcakes I put them in the pans, realized I forgot the papers and shrugged thinking I’ll just bake them as is, then I realized I forgot to spray the pans. As I was scooping it all out again I realized I forgot to add the eggs.

Last week was actually the first time I tried baking my bread. I put in the warm oven to help it raise better, then promptly forgot about it and woke the next morning to realized that I had bread all over my oven.

One time when I was pregnant I fell asleep while waiting for the macaroni to cook and it turned into a strange kind of mush. As a teenager I set my mom’s toaster on fire accidently. I could rattle off my cooking disasters for ages. I just shake my head and laugh at myself. Not only am I a goofy when I am walking around, etc. I am goofy in the kitchen too!! At least I am blessed so that nothing terribly drastic has ever happened.


Filed under Goofs, Humor, Memory