I Should Have Been a Pole Vaulter

Maybe I was in another life. hah! So, this is what happened. A few weeks ago the kids had a school talent show. Dorothy decided she was singing in it and Liz wanted to play the piano. It isn’t a really well organized thing and kids run around willy-nilly and you can hardly anything, but hey, its fun.

It is also a silent auction, so at one point I was walking back towards my family, seated on the floor, after having browsed past the tables showcasing the baskets and items up for auction. Paul had both boys on his lap, and Dorothy and her friend were sitting a little in front of him.

I could tell my marvelous husband was struggling with both boys, so I offered to take the baby – walking up between him and the two girls. He hands me James.

You know how when someone hands you something rather large and you suddenly feel like you are two close to that person and you take an unconcious step backwards? Well, that’s how I felt and what I did.

I realized, with horror, that I was standing on my Daughter’s hand – all my weight standing. In order to get off her hand I need to move my right leg so it was more underneath me. As my leg moved back it met an obstacle – Dot’s friend. Before I knew it I was falling backwards – baby in arms, camera around neck.

The first thought that flashed through my mind was “I can’t fall on her” – she has cancer it would kill her – or just break every bone in her body – since they are weaker because of the chemo and treatments and stuff.

So I jumped. I twisted my body to the side, shielded the baby and held him in front of me and jumped backwards – up over the little seated girl. Yup, I am that good. I landed flat on my back – well more on the left side of my back as I had the baby in my right arm and was holding him up higher so he wouldn’t hit the floor. The camera, still around my neck, crashed on the floor and bounced.

I lay there half laughing, thinking, “This only happens to me.” and “Thank goodness most everyone else is too engrossed in the talent show to notice what just happened.”

The baby was fine – he wanted to go for another fun ride, in fact. Camera was fine *whew*, and the little girl – we hoped was fine. I cleared her mostly – but caught her shoulder. The grandparents were panicked about me (I did kinda hit my head when I landed) and I insisted I was fine. (Though the next couple days were excruciatingly sore ones)

Turns out the little girl was fine except for a broken shoulder. I felt horrible, the parents and grandparents assured me it wasn’t my fault and they were amazed at my ability to high jump backwards. The awesome news is that the should is healing fine without surgery or pins or anything – such a relief. 😀

I have to say though, I think this is a sport I should leave to the professionals – they have those cushy little cushions to land on!


Filed under Goofs, Humor

6 responses to “I Should Have Been a Pole Vaulter

  1. zoo

    YOU BROKE A CHILD’S SHOULDER!? LOL it’s not funny like… ha ha funny, but a little bit he he funny (broken shoulder not funny at all, of course) but just… the imagery and unfathomable of it all. poor kid.

    glad you all survived the fall and that her wounds are healing. sheesh. you should probably get a helmet. and bubble wrap for the innocents. 😉

  2. moniquel319

    Man If you wouldn’t of broken the girls shoulder I probably would have peed my pants laughing as I thought about that visual. I feel really bad about the girl. I guess though it could have been a lot worse for her and lucky for you Heavenly Father let you have wings! (Temporarily of course) Sorry you were soar. I fell down the steps with my son in arms a few months back. It was terrifying.

  3. You broke the girl’s shoulder?

    Oh, I just saw that Zoo wrote the same thing. Well, anyway!

    Wow. wow.

  4. Karen

    Oh my goodness! You do have a talent for these things, don’t you? So sorry for what happened to all of you (luckily James was okay), and I’m glad everyone is healing.

  5. stephanie

    Graceful (hee hee). You poor thing. Hope your head is completely better now.

  6. April Brewster

    Wow! Your adventures are always both scary and funny! Hope both you and the little girl are doing better.

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