Veggie Wars

For days on end, possibly even weeks my husband and I have had the theme song to Veggie Tales stuck in our heads – to the extant that we have both memorized the entire song. We can’t seem to go anywhere without spontaneously breaking into song. On the rare moment I might acutally be thinking of something else one of the children inevitably starts singing the catchy little tune.

It’s hummable, it’s singable, it’s cute and quirky and about fun-loving vegetables, but after the four thousandth, five hundreth, and seventy third time something has got to be done.

And do it we did.

We re-wrote it.

This is the parent’s version. The version where all parent’s relate because we know what would really happen if we turned our children loose (especially the boys) in the produce aisle.

I give you:

Veggie Wars

If you like to squash ripe tomatoes
And can throw them half a mile
If green beans can become fiery missiles
Launched at people in the produce aisle.

Then have we got a show for you.

Veggie wars, veggie wars,
Veggie wars, veggie wars
Veggie wars, veggie wars,
Veggie wars – veggie wars.

Potato Bombs
Thrown at moms
Give no qualms
Veggie wars

Bazooka beans
In camo greens
Go unseen
Veggie wars

With Ninja power
Makes you cower
Veggie wars

There’s never ever ever ever ever
Been a war like veggie wars
There’s never ever ever ever ever
Been a war like veggie wars

It’s time for veggie Wa-a-a-a-a-rs!

(please feel free to sing, and if you aren’t sure of the tune, click on the link above – it will take you to the real theme song so you can practice 😉 )


Filed under Every Day Life, Humor, Music, Writing

5 responses to “Veggie Wars

  1. That was Awsome!! We Love veggie tales and I know that song and sing it all the time. I love,love,love the re-write you did!

  2. Awesomeness! lol I’ll have to sing this new version to my husband. lol

  3. moniquel319

    I had to stop and get the tune in my head before I read your version so I could “sing” it in my head the way you would want it to sound. By-the-way I just got over a full years worth of having that tune stuck in my head thank you for making me relive that. Also if you get cable and your kids watch Noggin don’t watch Wonder Pets. You’ll never hear the phrase “the phone is ringing” again without breaking into song. Just sayn…

  4. PerpetualChocoholic

    I was afraid to read the lyrics because I’ve just recently forgotten all the veggie tale songs. I don’t want to get them stuck in my head again!;-)

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