Ring of Fire

brought to you by Sir Reginald, the mouse.

Dear Sir and Madame,
I hearby issue an ultimatum. You are to cease and desist your attempts of dooming me to a death by conflagration immediately. You invade my home, land, and wood, provide me a comfortable dry place to live, and yet set it on fire multiple times. I understand you need to eat, but surely you have places indoors to cook your food and don’t need to use the thing you call a grill. Don’t try blaming me for living in your steel deathtrap either, you have given me little choice.

I hear your mocks of laughter, what can a wee little mouse do to us when we can simply light his furry little hide on fire. Well, I shall tell you, I will not go down without a fight and I shall take everything I can down with me.

Should you attempt to evict me from my home once more one of the following will happen.

1. I, burning tail and all, shall flee under your fancy giant’s home and set it all on fire.
2. Though I may perish by fire I shall linger on your metal wires contaminating your food so that you may all die a slow agonizing death.
3. My ancestors shall haunt your home all the days of your lives, your children’s lives and the you grandchildren’s lives. No matter where you go you cannot hide. There is no place we can’t infiltrate.

I fear not death by fire, for I know I will be avenged.

THIS IS WAR.

Respectfully,
Sir Reginald, The Mouse

(After finding and reading the above letter ensconced in our grill on our back patio we heard the following faint mocking strains. The words were slightly altered, so I have posted the lyrics we heard. Please press play on the following and then scroll down and sing along.)

In this pit I’m king
And rule this Fiery Ring
It is my Wild Desire
To die by martyr’s Fire

I Fell Into A Burning Ring Of Fire
I Went Down, Down, Down
And The Flames Went Higher

And It Burns, Burns, Burns
The Ring Of Fire
The Ring Of Fire

I Fell Into A Burning Ring Of Fire
I Went Down, Down, Down
And The Flames Went Higher

And It Burns, Burns, Burns
The Ring Of Fire
The Ring Of Fire

The Taste Of revenge Is Sweet
I’ll flavor all your Meat
I’ll scamper to your house
And you will curse this mouse.

I Fell Into A Burning Ring Of Fire
I Went Down, Down, Down
And The Flames Went Higher

And It Burns, Burns, Burns
The Ring Of Fire
The Ring Of Fire

I Fell Into A Burning Ring Of Fire
I Went Down, Down, Down
And The Flames Went Higher

And It Burns, Burns, Burns
The Ring Of Fire
The Ring Of Fire

And It Burns, Burns, Burns

The Ring Of Fire

The Ring Of Fire

*Many thanks to my HHH (Handsome Huggable Hubby) for collaborating with me on the lyrics.

** Dedicated to Lindsay and her inspiring post.

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4 Comments

Filed under Humor, Music, Writing

4 responses to “Ring of Fire

  1. AAAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!! This just made my WEEK! You are SO funny, Julia. (But keep this up and, well…) I’m sending you a BIG hug!

    • Thanks, Lindsay! I have to thank you for giving me an idea on how to write the post. I’ve been thinking about writing it for a while (ever since we found the mouse living in our grill – it’s funny cause we’ll chase it off to cook, but the next time we go to use the grill it is right back in there again). Anyway, your post got me thinking, and then I thought of the song, and then I thought – I wonder if I can find a chipmunky/mousy version… and well, I was giddy with glee upon searching Youtube 😀

  2. Cute. Creative. Thanks for the laugh!

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