Choose to Rise Above

I watched this beautiful video recently and it really got me thinking. It’s a powerful message and reminder to be kind to everyone.

What’s been on my mind in the days since watching it are the choices we make. Unfortunately, no matter how many amazing videos there are that teach us not to bully or be unkind, no matter how we strive to teach it in our homes, churches, and schools, as long as there is agency to choose right from wrong, there will be those who choose to be unkind and downright mean. Sometimes the unkind acts are intentional, sometimes they are unintentional – the offenders may not even be aware they have caused offense or hurt feelings.  Not only do we need to teach our children how to be kind and (hopefully) not be the bullies, and by all means, correct their behavior when and if they are, we also need to teach our children that they have a choice on how they will let others affect their lives.

We can choose to let them rule us, let their words and actions keep us from reaching our full potential. We can choose to let them drive us from church. We can choose to  hold a grudge that will eat away at our spirits.

We can choose to not let what others say and do keep us from reaching our full potential. We can choose to not let others drive us from developing a close and personal relationship with God. We can choose to forgive and rise above, gleaning good lessons from our experiences.

Some might read my post so far and say, easy for you to say such things, what can you possibly know about being bullied or picked on.

You’re right, I may not know as much as some, but this is what I do know.

I know the moments when I walked into the lunchroom in grade school and sat at a table only to have it immediately evacuated. But, it taught me to be more compassionate and to seek out the lonely.

I know the sinking feeling of waiting to be picked for a team and always to be chosen last. To hope that this time I’d do a good job at kickball or whatever sport we were playing, only to be jeered by both my team and the others when I royally messed up. But, it taught me to be patient with others as they practice and learn to do things.

I know all to well the embarrassment and dismay of finding out that vicious rumors were being spread about me, not only at high school, but at church – and they were started by the girls I went to church with. But, it taught me to be careful with my words.

My list could continue, there were many moments through middle school and high school that were hard and hurtful. I was rather awkward, and though I strove to show confidence, I was a quivering mess inside. But, each experience taught me something and made me stronger. I know I wasn’t always successful in showing the lessons I learned. I am sure I made mistakes, though hopefully not the same ones that hurt me as I grew up.

We all, in life, experience many things, many trials, whether it be bullies, or sickness, or death. And with each trial we have a choice. We can give it power over us. We can become the victim. We can get angry and let it drive us away from all we hold dear and true, or we can stand tall, lift our chins and press on with conviction. Conviction that we are of worth – that no matter how others may see us, we are sons and daughters of God. We can develop forgiveness in our hearts, and be the comfort bringers to others who have suffered similar hurts who may not know how to overcome.

There are days when my girls come home upset, sometimes even in tears, with what kids have said to them. Does my heart ache for them? Yes! But, I know that if I strive to teach them right, these experiences can be for their good. Rather than sitting and talking about how mean the bullies are, or how we’re justified to dislike them or be rude back, we talk about how they can be sure not to treat others that same way and how we can choose to forgive and move on. I remind my dear daughters (and sons) that they are beautiful children of God, and that they have the power to choose. I remind them to keep that power, and not give it away.

Just the other day one of my daughters mentioned to me how she saw a girl sitting all by herself, and she went and sat with her. She didn’t know the girl, but she knew what it was like to sit alone. She excitedly told me how grateful the girl was and how the girl felt she had no friends. My daughter could understand and reach out because she had learned her lesson, and rather than letting it defeat her, she chose to rise above and bless someone else’s life. I was prouder in that moment, than any other about the choices she is making.

Yes, bullying needs to stop. It’s cruel. It’s wrong. Yes, we need to teach our children to be kind and to not bully.
But, we also need to teach our children that when they are picked on, made fun of, bullied, or treated unkindly, that they can choose to let it defeat them, or to let it make them into strong, compassionate people.  We need to teach them to rise above and to love, even the undeserving and the unkind. We need to teach not to sacrifice their eternal well being for anything.

I remember Lizy coming home one afternoon from elementary school in tears. The girl who upset her had been rather mean. We talked for quite a while. As her tears dried up a thoughtful look crept upon her face. “Mom, maybe that girl can’t help it. Maybe she doesn’t have someone at home to love and teach her.”  I recall nodding my head in agreement as I told her, “we have no idea what trials others are passing through and how it affects them. But we can choose how we will let their words and deeds affect us.” She went to school the next day with the determination to show that girl more love, and what an example she taught me!

Gordon B. Hinckley says in his book “Stand a Little Taller”:

“Rise Above Weakness

‘And blessed is he that is found faithful unto my name at the last day, for he shall be lifted up to dwell in the kingdom prepared for him from the foundation of the world.’ – Ether 4:19

“Do we have frailties? Yes, of course we do. Do we have members of the Church who are not what they ought to be? Of course we do. Some of them may be your neighbors. You might have one for a roommate. Do not condemn the Church for that. Rather, say to yourself, “My membership in this Church is worth more than all of the evil that people can do to me,” if that is what it takes. You be faithful, you be true.”

“LOVE OVERCOMES

‘For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not parish, but have everlasting life.’ – John 3:16

“Love is the only force that can erase the differences between people — that can bridge chasms of bitterness.”

I strive to live my life so that I can be found faithful and true to the end. I do this one day at a time. Every day I have to forgive myself and forgive others.  I hope that they will in turn forgive me for actual or perceived wrongs that I have committed. I pray for love and compassion towards others, especially those who are difficult to love, and I hope they do the same for me when they find me difficult to love.

Life is a series of experiences designed to help us learn and grow and reach our full potential. It’s too short to let the intentional or unintentional injuries caused by others to the body, spirit, or soul get or keep us down. What we take away from life is up to us. Only you can decide how the actions or words of another will affect you. Will you get to the end with a list of grievances about how it’s been unfair, how you let others control your life by their actions? Or will you get to the end knowing that no matter what happened to you, you strove to love and learn the good lessons and let those experiences, both good and bad, shape you into the amazing person you are?

The choice is yours.

“A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.” –John 13: 34-35″

A Can of Worms

I know I’m opening a BIG one….
but here it is:

WHY I DON’T LIKE THE TWILIGHT SERIES

(ie: all the books beyond the 1st one)

I don’t mind the re-invention of the vampire & that they sparkle – hey, way to make it your own

I don’t mind that it’s “easy reading”

I don’t mind that it revolves around high school – hey I love YA, I read mainly YA, I write YA

I love the love story, the family ideals, and all that stuff

All the controversy about the anti-feminism whatever just makes me roll my eyes

All the controversy over how she got pregnant on the honeymoon makes me roll my eyes even more

I don’t care about any of that..

So, why does it make my stomach turn?

Because I can’t stand whiny heroines, number 1.

I spend an entire day listening to my children whine about one thing or another – and when I was in high school (because, I know, this is written for teens) I spent plenty of time listening to whiny peers – the last thing I want to do is escape into a book where I feel like slapping the main character upside the head and telling her to forget herself.

And number 2 – here is the big one – the number one clincher that made me hurl the book across the room and dent the wall with it (aside from not getting my big fight at the end – hey, I like me a big fight on occasion)

Bella doesn’t grow up, she doesn’t really change as a character and not only that, but she gets everything she wants with no sacrifice.

She gets her man.

She gets to transition to being a vampire with no problems at all.

Not only does she get one uber special vampire gift, she gets TWO!

Because the transition to the whole vampire thing is so easy, she doesn’t have to leave her family behind, she gets to live in a perfectly sculpted world that she doesn’t deserve – and yet I’m sure she’ll still find a way to whine about it.

I know it’s a book.

I know it’s not real life.

But there has to be a thread of reality – and I can’t suspend my belief that far.

Every good and great thing comes at a price or with a sacrifice – it has to, or we won’t cherish it.

Some sacrifice love for money or some money for love. You can have both, but there will be a sacrifice in that somewhere, somehow along the way. I have made many sacrifices for my love and family and they have made many for me.

So, why is it a big deal to me? It’s just a book….

Well, books teach, and I think we aren’t doing the rising generation any favors by encouraging them in the belief that they can have everything they want without any effort, toil, tears, or sacrifice. I think as authors we have an obligation to encourage our readers to grow and develop. We should create heroines and heroes that they want to emulate that have good, strong characteristics and are willing to forget themselves for the betterment of others.

Character flaws are essential in creating believable characters, but we need to give our heroes and heroines a way to learn from them, grow from them and conquer them. Bella had so many opportunities to change and improve herself, especially as she became a Mom (and I know she had phsyical sacrifice there to some extent) but even then she remained flat and rather self-centered.

Yes, I know plenty of people who exhibit the same traits as Bella, but they are not traits I want (or want my children) to aspire too – they are not traits befitting a heroine that one should aspire to be like. And even after she receives all she ever wanted I can’t help feeling that she doesn’t seem grateful at all – she simply seems to accept it as though that was the way it was supposed to be.

You may think that what we or our children read has little impact on us or them, but I think it does. Most won’t recognize the lessons one way or another, but the lessons are there for good or for ill. These lessons are taught and learned whether or not we choose to acknowledge or even recognize them. Some are wise enough to see them and avoid the pitfalls, but some won’t be.

I believe we have a moral obligation to  show how people can learn and better themselves – how our choices have consequences good and bad, how if we want something great – we must sacrifice something great.

If Bella had even had to struggle a bit with her vampire change, or realized that her incessant whining wasn’t cool, then I would have been able to see past the other many flaws. But, I can’t see past flaws that encourage a failing society to fail further.

So, I will continue to enjoy the first Twilight book (Bella’s not so bad in that book)- because I do, my copy is dog-eared and worn from late night escapes, but for me the series ends there, because then I can pretend she turned into the Bella I wanted her to be.

P.S. Feel free to discuss, but please don’t bash and if you are rude or use inappropriate language I will delete your comment.

Thoughts

It’s been a while since I’ve sat down and written. I try to keep my posts upbeat, or at the very least positive in nature and it’s been rather hard the past few weeks. I have found myself missing my Lizy so much that sometimes it’s excruciating and I have to remember to breathe. But, while I miss her, I also find and have joy in my five wonderful, living children and my most amazing husband.

To say life these last two months has been a roller coaster ride is a bit of an understatement. Paul is starting a new job – it’s wonderful, an answer to prayers. He will have better hours, better pay, more vacation, more holidays, better benefits. Such a blessing, and the change will be a good thing, especially for him, helping him to take another step to “moving on”.

I have a new calling at church – I am the Young Women’s president (that means I work with the 12-18 year-old girls at church- planning activities, etc.). While I am a bit overwhelmed, and feel completely inadequate, I love these girls. I can’t help but think, while Heavenly Father had to bring my Lizy home to him, he gave me eleven beautiful young women to watch over in her place. I will be busy, and busy is good.

Lastly, my father, who has been battling brain cancer, passed away this past Friday. I will miss him, I already have been missing him these past few months, but I know he is with Lizy and so many more family members. I smile as I picture the joyous return and reunion he must have had. I am grateful he didn’t suffer longer than he had to. I am grateful family has been able to be there to help him and my mother through this time. And I am so grateful to be going to Oregon for his funeral. It will be the first time in 13 years (do to geographical locations) that all of kids will be together.

It’s hard to describe how I feel about things. So much has been happening, life altering things and I go from being happy one minute to in tears the next. But one thing I do know, and that is that we have a loving Heavenly Father who is aware of what we are going through and showers us with tender loving mercies. I saw a saying recently that I have come to love:

“Sometimes God calms the storm…sometimes God lets the storm rage and calms His child.”

I feel at peace. I feel His love. I know families are eternal and that while the years ahead will be hard without Lizy and my Father, I know I’ll be with them again at length. Some might say life is unfair. That too much has hit our family. I say life isn’t about fair or unfair. It’s a series of challenges that will help us to learn what we need to know and to develop the strength we need to prepare us for the next stage of our eternal existence. Each of us is different, and our challenges and tests are different. Only He knows what we need to reach our full potential. I think often of this quote by C.S. Lewis:

“Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on; you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make any sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of – throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were being made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace.”

The challenges we are given are uniquely fit for us, and just because ours may be more visible than others, they are no more important than the many trials and challenges faced by others. Heavenly Father will give us all the strength we need to overcome our personal challenges in life, no matter how unbearable they feel. We can learn from them and find beautiful things admist the thorns. Each of us has the potential to become that beautiful palace if we let the Master do His work.

And, even in the dark hours, there are many beautiful things. Today is Paul’s and my anniversary. We have had fourteen wonderful, marvelous years together and look forward to so many more. Paul is my rock, my strength. When I flounder and feel weak, I can lean on him. He loves unconditionally, and is a marvelous father to our amazing children. I love him with all my heart and admire all that he is.

Even in the hard dark moments, I am surrounded by many beautiful things –

namely my family.
I am SO blessed.
Every hour.
Every day.

My One Real Regret

If I have one regret so far in life, it’s that my journal keeping skills have been rather haphazard.

Oh, I have some in books, some on the computer, some blog post, some facebook statuses (actually, i should find a way to gather all those up – I think that would be my most comprehensive journaling to date – so sad), but nothing like I wish I had now.

I suppose, with all the things I had to do in life, writing in my journal seemed less important. Now, praying, and scripture reading, and child rearing received top billing, and rightly so. But journaling was cast by the way-side. If I was going to take the time to write, then it was going to be on my books, etc. There were so many other things to do that were so much more important than keeping a consistent journal.

I was wrong.

So very, very, wrong.

I would give anything now to have a record of Lizy’s life and my memories of her. The few I have, I cling to, afraid the memories will slip gradually from my fingers leaving me with nothing more than a gaping hole in my heart. I devour every word I have written about her, conjuring up the images of her through the years. And how I wish I had written more. SO much, much more.

Since I wasn’t big on journaling, I didn’t push it either. Oh, I gave them journals, but I only encouraged them a little, and now, I wish I had made it a bigger deal. The first thing I did was scour her room looking for anything in her own hand expressing her thoughts and feelings so I could feel close to her. I found some, but I wished for more.

It does little to lament the past. I can’t change it. I can’t make words magically appear on paper from years past, but I can learn from it and change the future.

I am going to be a devoted journal keeper. I won’t let the days slip past without writing about the wonders of the days, my feelings, the amazingness of my children.

My father has brain cancer. I think I mentioned that before. They suspect he has less than a month left and the one thing I am so grateful for is that I have a record of his life, his experiences, his adventures. Robert won’t ever meet his grandpa in person (just over skype) but he can still know him because he has faithfully kept a journal.

I want my kids, grandkids, great-grandkids to know me. I hope I never have another experience like Lizy, but I don’t want to take a chance. I want a record of their amazing lives and experiences – both from me and from them. I yearn and crave Lizy’s words and memories. I want to wrap myself in them. I miss her so very much. I am grateful I have what I have, but so disapointed I didn’t write down more.

I know I can write now, and I will, but it’s not quite the same – remembering rather than being in the moment, but it will still be something.

President Spencer W. Kimball said, “I promise you that if you will keep your journals and records, they will indeed be a source of great inspiration to your families, to your children, your grandchildren, and others, on through the generations. Each of us is important to those who are near and dear to us and as our posterity read of our life’s experiences, they, too, will come to know and love us. And in that glorious day when our families are together in the eternities, we will already be acquainted.”

Please, if you are inclined, learn from my mistakes. Tragedy can come when least expected. I would hope that it evades you completely, but don’t take the chance. Keep a journal. Write down everything you can about you, about your children, you family, your experiences, your adventures. I promise it will be a comfort to you if tragedy strikes and it will touch the lives of those who will read it in the future.

Easing the Ache

I just got back yesterday morning from my trip to Oregon.

They say you can never go home…

but sometimes you can.

It was odd being there without my family, but SO good seeing old friends and spending time with my parents.

I don’t know what I expected upon seeing my father.

I knew things would be different.

And they were.

He wouldn’t be the same strong man with confidence in his step.

But, no matter how he changes physically. The love and light forever remains in his eyes.

His testimony of the Gospel of Jesus Christ remains firm and steadfast and he is sure in his love for Heavenly Father as well as Heavenly Father’s love for him.

He still has a smile on his face.

My mother is a pillar of strength and goodness. Smiling her way through with faith that whatever happens it will be God’s will and for the best.

I am SO blessed to have such parents. Parents who have taught me and shown me the way to true happiness. Not the kind that you attempt to buy or find through praises and accomplishments. The happiness of knowing you stand for your beliefs and that true joy comes in giving of yourself to others.

We may struggle to make ends meet, but I am RICH. I have so much.

My Dad is and always will be one of my heroes. He is an amazing man.

He started Chemo yesterday, yes he does have brain cancer.

I also have a friend, a very close dear friend, who found out (at about the same time as my Dad) that she has breast cancer. She starts chemo today. My heart aches for her and her family.

I cry sometimes when I think of them and how far away I am. Helpless to do much but pray.  Mostly though, I am happy.  Happy for the life Dad has lived and the lessons he has bestowed upon all of us. Happy for the memories my friend and I have created and will continue to create. They both have taught me so much and my life is richer knowing them.

I have hope, a lot of hope. There have already been so many miracles in all of this. And I know that some of the hardest words we’ll ever say is “Thy will be done.” And not just the saying of it, but truly meaning and feeling the words as well.

I believe we become stronger in our challenges if we let them bring us closer together and to our Heavenly Father. I know prayers make a difference. I know they are heard and answered. God doesn’t keep the hard or bad things from happening, but he gives us strength to make it through and peace.

This year, I Resolve to….. BLECH!!!!

New Year Resolutions.

That phrase makes me groan.

It brings to mind things like

“This year I am going to pray EVERY day”

or

“This year I am going to read the scriptures EVERY day”

or

“I am going to loose ALL the weight I gained over six pregnancies”

or even

“This year, I WILL be published.” (which, not to offend those who set this goal, is rather silly since we can’t control who says yes to our manuscript – though we can definitely try to get there.)

Some time ago I gave up on resolutions. It seemed that the goals made on New Years were doomed to fail or to make us feel guilty for our many flaws.

So, I  avoided them altogether.

But, aren’t we encouraged to set goals, to reach for new heights, to better ourselves?

The answer of course, is

YES!!!

So, this year I thought a bit about these resolutions and I had an epiphany.

Setting goals that require perfection are ridiculous.  If I’m not in a habit of reading and praying every day (or just really forgetful and distract easily), I can’t expect to be (or suddenly remember everything), simply by setting a goal.  (some people may be able to do that, but I sure can’t)  Setting goals that are beyond our control, or far too lofty, fall into the ridiculous category as well. Besides, making resolutions we are bound to fail makes us feel lousy.

So, I thought about what I wanted to accomplish this year and my difficulties in getting there.  Ultimately I would love to be 100 %  in reading my scriptures and praying every day.

But, I’m human.

which means, I forget. I get SO busy that I just plain forget.

Even if I set a goal to do it EVERY day, I know I’ll still forget, inevitably, some day in the year I’ll be SO busy it will slip my mind. And then

BAM

Resolution

FAILED

What I decided to do instead, is to set a small goal – with wiggle room even – that doesn’t require perfection, but will serve as a constant reminder to do the other things.

My resolution this year is to:

read the Ensign every month, cover to cover.

It’s just a magazine. Not hard to read. But the articles are such that will remind me to read and to pray. So, by working on my very reachable resolution, I will come closer to the other, loftier, resolutions. And maybe, some day I will be 100%.

Some of other resolutions to the above cases could be: send out 5 query letters (resolution met – go send out some more)or loose five pounds (and if you loose more, then AWESOME! but at least you met your resolution).

And you argue, but all the quotes say:

“Failure is the road to success” or “if you don’t set lofty goals you won’t attain them”

this is true, but I dare to argue:

You can also set yourself up for failure!

and if you do that

Discouragement can and does set in.

Yes, set your lofty goals

but give yourselves stepping stones to get there!

And don’t expect it to happen in a year

or five

or even ten.

Just keep stepping along those stones and pretty soon, before you realize it, you’ll have reached

the top of the mountain.

I believe it is the little things along the way, the short goals we make and achieve as we strive for the lofty ones, that create character and turn the weak into the mighty.

So, this year I am changing my stance on resolutions and….

I resolve to be a better person at the end of the year than I was at the beginning. I’m going to read my Ensign every month, and have a candle light dinner once a week with my husband, and enjoy all the little goals (like sending out queries) I set and achieve along the way.

Acceptance

I’ve been thinking about acceptance today. Not so much acceptance of trials and such in our lives but of people.  Perhaps it’s because as my girls get older they struggle more with acceptance in school. Or perhaps it comes from knowledge of many different kinds.

Everyone desires and needs acceptance. Especially acceptance from friends and family.

I think back on my own experiences. I always had a loving and accepting family. I was lucky.  It was a little harder with friends. Many friends ceased to accept me as a friend because they didn’t accept my beliefs. It always frustrated me. I asked a friend once, “Why can’t you accept me as a friend even if you don’t accept what I believe?”

She looked surprised.

I continued. “Can’t we agree to disagree and leave it at that? Go on being friends?”

She thought about it for a moment and conceded.

We all make mistakes.

We all make different choices in life.

I may not agree with your choices.

You may not agree with my choices.

Does that mean we have to cease to accept one another?

We need friends. We need support. We want people to accept us, foibles and all. Should we not then, be willing to accept others despite choices and beliefs?

I had the opportunity to experience an awesome event a few weeks ago. Our youth group leaders received a call from another religious denomination. They were learning about other religions and wondered if they could bring their youth group to one of our youth activities. A date was agreed upon. We gave them a tour of our building and then, through the 13 Articles of Faith, explained our beliefs.

No one argued, yelled or fought. In fact, their pastor went out of his way to point out the similarities in our beliefs. I could see that he and others clearly did not agree on a few points. But they weren’t rude. They didn’t get up and walk away. They accepted us. They accepted that even though our beliefs and choices might be a little different we could still be kind and loving towards each other.

Dot came up to me the other day and asked, “Mom, why is it that most of my friends have challenges?”

“What do you mean?” I replied.

“Well, my best friend in Oregon had Autism, and one of my good friends here speaks a little funny, and the other friend has some learning disabilities.”

“Does it bother you?”

“Of course not!” She exclaimed, indignant that I should suggest such a thing. “They are awesome people.”

“And that,” I said, “is why. You see beyond their challenges to the people they truly are. ”

I count myself fortunate to have children who are willing to accept and love even when it’s not the popular choice, and I hope I always do the same.

It can take a great deal of courage to ask for and give acceptance.  I hope my children, friends, and family will always know that despite choices and such, I will always love and accept them.

No matter what.

And maybe, if I can do that, I will be able to make a small difference in the world and in someone else’s life for good.

Who’d have thunk?

When we moved to Cincinnati I thought things would be a certain way.

For example, I figured that I would get even more eyebrows and “four-headed alien” looks from people as we marched our brood around – especially going from five to six! I mean good grief, I was at the Oregon zoo once with just four and people were looking at me as though we belonged in the exhibit.

It doesn’t bother me. I know that large families are becoming a rare species, but I LOVE the chaos and hubub (I love the word) that rolls along with large families. Sure, we have to work harder to make ends meet, (we eat lots and LOTS of soup and casseroles because they stretch best), our kids go without gameboys and ipods and cell phones and brand spanking new name brand clothes, and they’ll probably have to work and pay their own way through college (makes them appreciate it more, right?).

But they have built in friends. People that will say, when no one else will, I’ve got your back. They have their own cheer squad, no one cheers louder than the kids during soccer games and band concerts (yes, we cheer at band concerts, but only at appropriate times, I promise). There are tough times. Goodness knows at least twice a weak I’m ready to sell my kids on the street corner in exchange for my sanity, but sanity is highly over-rated. (Have you ever noticed how only the insane people have fun?).

I pray and fret over my kids and how I am doing as a mother. I plead with Heavenly Father about how to help them in their struggles. But admist all the struggles and pleading and crying there is nothing sweeter than a baby’s smile, a two/three-year-old’s sloppy kiss, the five-year-old’s giant hug and “help” with the dishes, the 8-year-old’s laughing face at her dad’s latest joke, the ten-year-old’s sweet smile as we snuggle down for a story, and the eleven-year-old’s grin as you flop on the bed to have a heart-to-heart. Every moment is WORTH it.

Anyway, I digress, I love my family and I’ve gotten used to coming up with clever jokes to answer questions like, “are they all yours? (in a disparaging tone), and “you’re done right?” (which by the way we are, but that’s not the point). And I was expecting that out here – in fact, I was expecting MORE of that out here. I was gearing up to feeling like the bizaar zoo exhibit with my crew of awesome kids and the dissaproving glances.

But you know what? Out here in grand ol’ Cincinnati I haven’t had a single alien-headed look, I haven’t had one disaproving glance, and I haven’t even had to use one of my clever jokes yet! Not once! In fact, most people think it’s awesome. They came from a big family too! They might not want to have that many kids, but they think it’s pretty awesome that I do. I love that.

And there’s something else I never expected. Just a cool little thing that is bizaar in the most WONDERFUL way. Just one little half hour every Sunday morning at 8:00. Who would have thought it, but a radio station out here plays Music and the Spoken Word  from 8-8:30 every Sunday morning. And not just any radio station but a rowdy rock radio station? (and not Christian Rock either, which would make a little more sense somehow) How awesome is that? We can put CDs in and listen to all the church music we want, but there is just something awesome about flipping on our radio way out here in Cincinnati and listening to a re-broadcast of Music and the Spoken Word. It makes my heart happy. It makes my hubby grin. It lightens our home and we think, WOW, this is SO cool.

And then we rush to the radio at 8:30 to snap it off before the rock music starts blasting away the spirit. Hee hee.

So those are two things I NEVER expected out here. Pretty awesome, huh?

By the way, after I wrote this I looked up Music and the Spoken Word – they actually have it broadcast all over the place! If you want to find a station that plays it near you, go to the link and look up your state! 🙂

Your teacher said what?

Yesterday my fifth grader came up to me in tears while I was cooking dinner. “My teacher says there are too many people in the world because there are too many big families and we have a big family and I’m worried their going to split us up.”

I think I got whiplash from my neck snapping around to stare at her while the other kids, because of course everyone had to be present at that moment, broke into confused and distraught mayhem. “Oh, honey. There’s plenty of space still on the planet and they couldn’t split our family up.” I went on a little about laws and such, then asked, “Did your teacher say because you had a big family you would be split up?”

“No, that’s what I felt like she was saying.”

“What did she say exactly?”

Elizabeth made a few more sniffles in an attempt to calm down. “She said they are planning on sending people to live on the moon because we are overpopulated because people have too big of families.”

Inside I was fuming, outside I managed to remain calm and collected and reassured my family that nothing no-how would be able to split us up and separate us.

We talked some more and sweet Elizabeth says, “maybe I misunderstood, mom.”

Misunderstood? Maybe, but all of it? I was fairly sure she didn’t misunderstand the big family, overpopulation, and live on the moon parts. Honestly, I could care less about living on the moon, I was just bothered by the impact the big family comment was having on my daughter. I dwelled on it all evening and this morning I decided it was worth a call to the school over. There are a lot of large families in our area and I was worried about the other kids who might be worried but not mention it to their parents, etc.

So, I called the principle, and she was understanding and said she would talk with the teacher.

There are a few things I am grateful for because of this situation, first I am so glad that Elizabeth was comfortable coming and talking to me about something that bothered her so much. Go Liz! Second, from everyone’s reaction it was evident that even though they may fight a lot, they sure do love each other. 😀

While these are wonderful things to realize, I would like to clobber the teacher for causing needless alarm and worry to a young child. I can understand it in highschool, even middleschool, but grade school, when most kids aren’t old enough to understand personal and political agendas or view points? Come on.

Gurgle Gurgle Slosh

Traduccion al Espanol

Our snow has all melted and been washed away. It has been raining pretty steady for quite some time and we began to worry about water under the house again – what with 18 inches of snow melting and tons of rain since then.

As the rain continued through the  day yesterday Paul worked to make sure our ditch (or stream/river depending on the season) was cleaned out and cleaned out our problem gutters too.

Well last night it began to really rain. Not the light rain we have had all week but a steady downpour – it has been a LONG time since we have seen rain that heavy and steady.   It was midnight when Paul through on his coat and shuffled out to check under the house. What had been a measly two inches had risen shockingly to 18 inches of water.  We grabbed the sump pump and put it too work.  The street looked like a mini river.

After we had done all we could we headed inside to go to bed. It was 1:00 in the morning and we heard an odd dripping in the living room. It was raining so hard that we had water dripping down our chimney – not much at least.  We stuck a bucket under there, said a prayer and went to bed. Before we went we flipped the heat on as it was getting a bit chilly and the fire in our wood stove had gone out (we didn’t feel like trying to get it going again this late/early).

I think it took me at least half an hour to overcome my worries and fall asleep.  It was 2:00 in the morning when something woke me with a jolt.  In the dark I saw Paul’s shadow hunched over the heating vent as my sense zeroed in on a strange gurgling sound – like air trying to force itself through water.

There was water in our heating vents.  Paul shut off the heat and checked under the house.  It was up to two feet deep.  If it got much deeper we could have flooding and major damage.  We prayed and pled with the Lord to watch over my parent’s house as they were serving him on a mission. It took me a long time to fall asleep after that. Consequently I am exhausted today.

He did.  The rain stopped shortly.  There is still a ton of water under there, and we might have to replace the heating ducts, but it could have been so much worse.  Of course, I have no idea how we’ll manage to rip out and replace all the heating ducts if it comes to that, but I am confident that somehow that Heavenly Father will prepare the way.  The danger is, is that if they are a certain kind of duct, then they won’t dry properly and we’ll get mold. We’ve kinda been wondering about that anyway, because it seems that on the rare occasion we do turn the heat on, everyone in the house gets sick.  So, maybe we’ve had water in the vents in the past and just not known it because the heat wasn’t on. 

So, how do we get all this water under our house?  A few different reasons:

#1 We are on the down side of a hill – so when the ground is saturated and it has no where else to go water runs under our house.

#2 There is an easeway behind us that slopes toward our property and is not properly drained – the water pools at the end of it at the edge of  our back yard and runs onto our property.

#3 We have a lovely back yard neighbor – the kind that Karen writes about.  He is pumping the water out  from under his house/yard into our back yard (at least it doesn’t have clorine in it – that we know of anyway).  Isn’t that nice of him to share?  (be sure to read that last bit with a heavy load of sarcasm). The end of his hose butts up right against our wire fence.  Such a nice guy – like we needed more water.  Oh, and to add the icing on the cake he chopped off the limbs of trees and things that were hanging unto his property (that part is fine) and dumped them in our yard! (that part is not fine).  So all the debris he dumped in our yard clogged our ditch that we use for water run off. (of course Paul cleaned it out again, but that was just RUDE).   Paul said he was going to go talk to him, but I seriously doubt it will do an ounce of good. Of course I haven’t really met the guy yet and I may be jumping to conclusions, maybe his is just a nice clueless guy, but I really don’t see that as a possibility.  Ok, someone tell me to be nice and not judge…

Maybe the kids can accidently jam the end of his drainage tube with mud and gunk or…. cement?

Well, I shall turn my mean nasty thoughts aside and enjoy the gorgeous sunny day that God has blessed us with while I continue to call and compare heating and airconditioning guys.

Happy New Year. lol.