Tag Archives: mischief

Making Mischief

Food coloring and kids seem to have a magnetic draw. They seek each other out and create beautiful things. In my husband’s case it was a dyed poodle (I think – he can correct me if I am wrong) in Jacob’s case it was bubbles.

He wanted to dye the bottles of bubbles different colors – and dye them he did. I was out with the kids in the backyard and Jacob had gone inside to use the bathroom. Unbeknownst to me he made a swift detour into the kitchen and snagged the food coloring. I noticed when one of the bottles was spilled and looked a strange vibrant green. And then I saw a splotch of blue someplace else.

Then I saw the bottom of Jacob’s feet, after he had stepped in one of the puddles of spilled dyed bubbles – they were bright blue! James got a hold of one of the bottles and had his face dyed blue, his hands dyed blue, his feet dyed blue. It was decided that evening as we hung out in the teepee that we have a tribe of the blue-foot indians. 🙂

That was Monday, and I sincerely hoped the mischief was over, but unfortunately the trouble for the week had just begun. Tuesday brought a babysitter and disastrous consequences as she underestimated Jacob’s mischeif making prowess. He ate half a box of icecream bars, went through numerous cans of juice concentrate that I swear were poured all over the floor as you couldn’t walk a few feet without having to leaf a layer of skin behind as you peeled your foot off the ground. He also decided to paint with the toothpaste all over the bathroom floor. And where was the babysitter during all this? My question exactly – needless to say, we won’t be having her back anytime soon.

I had hoped that after yesterday he had exhausted his mischief creativity – but obviously not. Today I had a few important phone calls to make and disappeared into my office while the kids ate breakfast. Apparantly they wanted sugar and couldn’t open the big bucket. To Jacob’s credit, Dorothy was the one who had the big idea – he just was the happy benefactor. She decided to pull the 25 lb (or so) bag of sugar off the shelf in the garage, rip it open, and fetch a cup of sugar.

When I stumbled upon the scene, Jacob was happily sitting in the middle of the garage floor with sugar all around him happily chowing away. There was sugar EVERYwhere. I vacuumed and vacuumed and vacuumed some more, and that floor is still sticky.

Man, if the week keeps going like this, I will committed to the insane assylum at the end of it!

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Filed under Children, Humor, Jacob, Things Kids Say

E is For Egg

Encyclopedia of Me Meme 

 Much to my mother’s chagrin, when we were youngin’s on the farm, we used to lob rotten eggs onto the roof of the barn.  Well, we tried to anyway, usually they just smacked up against the side of the barn with a great resonating splat and horrible stench as we watched, in fascination, the remains dribbling slowly down. The side of the barn was pock marked with rotten egg remains for years – I don’t know if we ever successfully lobbed any onto the roof.

Oh and my favorite way to eat eggs are scrambled or in an egg-salad sandwhich – but those I like fresh, not rotten. 🙂

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Filed under Farm Stories, Meme

Lasting Effects of the Purse Escapade

We all know what happened with purse escapade -and if you don’t and want to know, you can read about it here.

By the time the purse was found, where only a toddler could manage to shove the thing, accounts were closed, new accounts opened, new drivers licence obtained, and new credit cards ordered.  We found ourselves with no checks (they were on order), no debit card (they were being mailed to us) and no credit cards (also being mailed to us) for the better part of a week.  Well, ok, we had a few checks as they give you a few complimentary checks upon opening a new account to tide you over while you order new checks.  They got us through the first week fine and we felt we were on top of the world when our credit cards arrived Friday.  Then, Saturday, to great choruses of Hallelujah, the debit cards arrived. Now I just needed the pin number which they send seperately.  No problem, should arrive Monday. 

Saturday I proceeded to activate my credit card and then I took my debit card off it’s paper to put in a safe place until the pin number arrived. 

Monday came and so did my pin-number. Estatic and full of glee I went to get my debit card and activate it.  It wasn’t there. In fact it wasn’t anywhere on Paul’s desk, my desk or either office.  It wasn’t in my purse or in my wallet.  Once again a very frustrating search took place.  Even more frustrating because we knew it had to be here somewhere.  Finally we decided I either put it in a really safe place (never to be found again) or Jacob ran off with it when we weren’t looking (also never to be found again).  I didn’t want to call the bank AGAIN so I decided just to tough it out.  The checks would hopefully arrive soon.  An entire week passed by.  The complimentary checks had long since run out, leaving me with no checks and no debit card, only a credit card which I was loathe to use.

Finally the following Monday the checks arrived.  I was in business now, at least not feeling so estranged from our bank account anyway.

Tuesday was busy and chaotic.  Trying to get ready for an appointmet and for volunteering at the school. I was hopping down the hall trying to pull on my last sock when Emily nonchalantly walks up to me.

“Here, I found this,” she hands me a thin plastic card and walks off.

To my amazement I realize I am holding the lost debit card, activation sticker still in place.

“Wait, where did you find it?” I called quizically.

“Oh,” she replied like it was an every day occurance,”In the bin with all the train pieces.”

I gave whoop, twirled her through the air, and called her my little hero.  To Jacob I gave a whoop twirled him through the air and called him my little rapscallion, because no matter what kind of safe place I might have thought of to stick it, I never would have put it there.

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Filed under Children, Em, Goofs, Humor, Jacob, Miracles

Mischief Managed

I kicked back in my chair after a long day, thankful for the opportunity to relax. I pulled out the lap top and began to mull over various topics that I could write about. I was enjoying the peace and quiet at the end of the day with all the kids in bed when my husband called to me,

“Were you doing something with your nail polish remover? ‘Cause it reeks in here!”

“Ummm, no.”

I knew there was trouble. I sighed and put my computer away, wistfully dreaming of those quiet moments writing away, and hauled myself to the back of the house. As I approached the kid’s bedroom I heard Paul, “Now, which one of you got into mommy’s make-up?”

I was too beat and defeated to be mad; I just wandered into the bathroom and took stock of the state of my make-up drawer. It wasn’t as bad as I had expected. The lid was off one nail polish and it was spilled over a lot of stuff, and half of my foundation was spilled as well. I dumped all the affected items in the sink and began to sort them out and clean them up. I ran out of polish remover though, so I have to finish later.

No one was fessing up so Paul called everyone into the bathroom where I was cleaning and a troop of three sleepy-eyed girls staggered in. Elizabeth was cleared right away and it was left to Dorothy or Emily. We knew it wasn’t Dorothy when she started proclaiming, “I promise, I promise, it wasn’t me this time!” And Emily finally admitted it was her. She was already crying so hard we didn’t punish her anymore and I think she learned her lesson.

The only things that were really ruined were the make-up brushes. So, it wasn’t so bad. But now I’m wondering, they say things come in threes . . .

. . . so, what’s next??

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Filed under Children, Em, Goofs, Parenting

Desitin and other Misadventures

My five year old’s nickname is Comet. Well, actually it is Dot Com, but we ended up calling her Dot or even more often Comet because she rockets around everywhere. I have never seen so much energy and mischief bottled into one tiny person. And boy does she have a strong will; and she’s smart too. That can be a very dangerous combination: mischief, strong will, and intelligence.

Don’t let that sweet innocent looking picture over there fool you, I’ll simply recount some of her greater antics and let them speak for themselves. When she was just over one she, with the help of her older sister, ate half a bag of ginger snaps and that was when all the trouble began. 🙂

Some of her most memorable moments:

  • She was two and a half when she ate half a bottle of tums (I think she won’t have any problems with osteoporosis any time in the near future!) while supposedly going potty, our poor babysitter nearly died, but Dot was just fine 🙂
  • Desitin . . .

Charming Dot was turning three and because we were celebrating her birthday with Grandma and Grandpa on a Saturday Paul and I ended up going on a date on her actual birthday, a Friday. We got home and were greeted by excited Elizabeth and Emily. I noticed that a certain daughter who had a knack for trouble was not bashing into my knees with excitement to see us home, so I asked our babysitter where she was hiding. (now don’t get the wrong idea here, our babysitter was awesome and was in no way irresponsible or accountable for Comet’s fixes) She mentioned that she was in the bathroom but had been there for a few minutes already and was about to go check on her when we had walked in. I headed up stairs (we were managing in Hillsboro and had a cute townhouse apartment at the time) and noticed that it was awfully quiet. Now, those of you with young children, know that quiet is not necessarily a good thing. I opened the door and looked around. No Dot, just a little white ghost standing by the sink! Ahhh! That was my daughter! Dot has always had a dry skin problem that we used a really thick Eucerin cream for, well apparently she was feeling dry but. . . grabbed the desitin instead, it’s all the same color anyway, right? Yikes, have you ever tried to wash desitin off of anything, especially out of hair? She had it all over her face, all through her hair, and all over the bathroom. Funny, we should have nick named her “Casper” at that point. 🙂

  • The Closet . . .

This by far has to top them all off. She was four and she and her sisters had been playing in their room. Weeelll, they had taken out every toy, every dress, every article of clothing and they were all over the room, it was a monumental nightmare and mommy was MAD! So I bagged everything up and for lack of a better place I shoved it all in their closet. But how to keep the out of the closet? I had a brilliant idea and got the ratchet strap that we always used to strap things on top of the car with. I wrapped it around the doors and ratcheted that strap down as tight as I possibly could; I could barely get my index finger between the door and the strap. I was still fuming however so I left them all to stew a bit while I taught my last piano lesson for the day. Dad came home shortly after and I told him what had happened. Just then Dorothy began to cry so Paul went to check on her. A moment later I here his voice floating down the hall, “Julia need to come see this . . .” Up I got and headed into their bedroom. Because of the angle of the door all I could see as I walked in was the edge of the closet. I notice that the girls had some how loosened the strap enough to poke their baby dolls behind it so they were hanging in a row. I walked further in and there was Dorothy, strapped by the waist to the closet door, her feet approximately 2 feet off the ground! It was absolutely hilarious, I had never laughed so hard in my life. What parent doesn’t have a secret desire to see their disobedient child strapped to a closet, especially self inflicted? Of course we made sure she wasn’t hurt or anything. What she had done was cling up her bunk bed ladder, about 1 1/2 feet away, climb up it, stick her feet our behind her and hook them into the strap. Of course I had the strap so tight that she could only wiggle down to her hips/waist and then got stuck, she couldn’t move in either direction. I still laugh about it today, does that make me mean? I sure hope not, I do love her dearly. 🙂

  • Syrup . . .

Okay, you probably know what is coming. She and Emmy decided to get into the syrup this last spring. I had just filled the syrup container that morning. I thought it was awfully quiet, and by now well schooled in the fact that with Dot quiet meant trouble. Not only will she have these “brilliant” ideas, she will usually con her younger sister into them as well. The catch was this: I was overdue with Jacob by a weak and a half, so I am past 9 months pregnant. I went walking into the kitchen ( where I finally found them) and there they were. The syrup was gone. I estimate they ate half, had a quarter of it on them, and the other quarter? All over the floor. I mopped twice, but left the scrubbing (it was still very sticky) to hubby when he got home, there was no way I was getting on my knees being that pregnant!! He tried to defend them by saying they were curious about the texture, etc. I simply looked at him and said, “They had a spoon.”

  • Pam . . . this one was just recent. She somehow got a hold of the Pam and then convinced Emmy that she should spray it . . . into her face! Luckily Emily was fine.
  • We’ve had diaper painting (ewww, icky, and yuck to cleaning that up), bunk bed jumping, “cleaning” with whatever she can find (at least she’s trying to help?), spilling red gatorade all over my mom’s carpet (rule is no drinks out of the kitchen), having a hayday in my make up drawer, and “weeding” my Dad’s iris, just to name a few. Have you seen the Cheaper By The Dozen movie with Steve Martin? The little brown haired girl that soaked the underwear in the meat? That would be Dorothy. 🙂

I hate to give the impression that she is all trouble, she is also the one that has the sweetest nature and is very loving and says the most incredible things. She’s the one that opened her prayer by saying, “Dear Heavenly Daddy”, and if that isn’t adorable I don’t know what is. Once at a parade when some Native Americans were passing by she excitedly grabbed my arm and asked, “Mom! Are those Nephites?” I busted a gut it was soooo cute. I love my little Comet who rockets through life and with out her life is boring. But boy, does she give me a run for my money!!!

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Filed under Children, Dot, Goofs, Humor, Parenting