Tag Archives: vampires

Something to Laugh Over

I was going to post this last night, but it was late and my husband was threatening to unplug my computer if I didn’t come to bed 🙂 so I decided to leave it until morning. Maybe that was a good thing.

Last night I had a horrendous nightmare – the gist was that James got a plastic bag unto his head somehow, quit breathing, turned blue and I had to give him CPR. I awoke gasping and spent a good portion of the night watching him breath and trying to calm down enough to catch some more shut eye.

So, after horrific nightmare, I need something funny to write to help chase away the shadows, and last night gives me the perfect oportunity.

A good friend of mine has Lupus (among other things – she’s going to die laughing if she reads this). And, no, that isn’t the funny part – be patient it is coming. Anyway, she called me yesterday to let me know that her Lupus is out of remission. I don’t know much about lupus so I asked her to give it to me straight. She explained about how it attacks the immune system and makes her allergic to the sun, and so on and so forth. The conversation continued similar to this,

Me: No more cruises for you kid.
Her: No. —- (a mutual friend of ours) called me a vampire this morning.
Me: I always thought there was something odd about you – I just never noticed the fangs.

so we continued to joke back and forth about vampirism. She needed Paul to come over to assist her Husband in giving her a blessing. So all was set and I hopped off the phone. Once I got off Paul asked me about Lupus, because he knew about as much as I did, and I proceeded to tell him. Then he got worried because he has had a bit of a cold lately and didn’t want to get her sick. So he asked me to call back and give her a heads up.

I pick up the phone, dial, and wait while it rings. As I listen to the phone ring Paul pipes up,

“Just mention to her that we were talking more about Lupin,”

I cut him off with a burst of laughter.

My friend answered the phone to my insane laughter, all while Paul looked at me if I were crazy.

Then he realized what he had said and started laughing, which made me laugh even harder – all while my friend was on the other end of the line, “What’s going on nutty?”

I tried to tell her through my laughter and tears but she couldn’t understand a word of it. Finally I managed to get out, “Paul thinks you’re a werewolf!”

“A what?”

“A Werewolf, he said you had Lupin!”

Her laughter joined ours, and I was at the point of my tummy hurting I was laughing so hard.

“You’re a vampire werewolf!”

“How does that work?”

“Well, usually you just suck blood, but on the full moon you turn into a werewolf AND suck blood.” I had tears pooring down my face at this point. Then I glanced at the calendar. “And, it is a full moon!”

One of the three of us did a werewolf howl, which sent the giggles going again. So, I did the only thing a respectable friend to someone with a serious illness would do. I wrote the corniest Vampire Werewolf poem I could think of inside of a gorgeous sunny beach scene card and took it to her. To which she told me, “Well, at least you took the news well.”

Which set us off laughing once again. 😀

And I thought Washington had the corner on Vampires and Werewolfs (Twilight) So, should anyone come this way for a visit, I cannot gaurantee your safety – especially should you come during a full moon.



Filed under Goofs, Humor